Harvest Has Begun

~Never relax! It's only your tension that's holding you together.~

We've begun harvest which I shall use as an excuse for not stopping by your blog as oft as I should. Also county business has seen a bit more activity than normal. On that regard let me just say that if you're having trouble with attendance at county board meetings you need only have someone apply to put in a large hog confinement.
The final outcome of that wasn't as it should have been but board chairmen don't vote. If you begin disallowing certain farming practices in areas zoned for that purpose then it's hard to see where this might lead.
We've been picking corn. The corn we've been in was blown over by a late season wind. It makes for plenty of tension if you're the one running the combine. (I only run the combine on days when Nebraska is playing at home. My operator has season tickets.) The combine is moving forward whilst the crop appears to be coming toward you and also to the side. That sideways movement can get confusing and dizzying. It's also difficult to remain 'on the row.'
Normally the soybeans are harvested first but it's been very wet here. The beans themselves are dry enough but the head on the combine must slide or glide along the ground and it's the ground that hasn't been dry enough. We're going to give it a go today.

On This Date In 1971

I've said before that Marilyn was different from all the girls I'd met before. She would actually go out with me. She and her family put up with the incessant old stories and jokes. They still do.

At the time this picture was taken, I was way ahead of Larry the Cable Guy. We still had a reception to do before the honeymoon and I was saying "Let's get er done."

I'd do the 36 years again with the same girl. I married well.

We've Got Trouble! Right Here In River City!

We have a fertilizer and chemical dealer located right on main street in Tekamah. They sell what you think they would sell. However it was brought to my attention that they have another 'product.' You can go in and get a butt rub. Men and women alike have been stopping in for one. Some of the ladies that have stopped have had trouble getting the words out of their mouths. It's hard to ask a strange man for a butt rub especially if you're elderly and those words have never trickled off of your tongue before.

I was appalled at first at the very thought. But peer pressure and curiosity finally got to me.

I entered the store under the guise of having to buy some chemicals to kill bugs in my grain bin. (wink, wink) I said, "uh, oh yeah, I'd also like a butt rub." It was supposed to be an order but it was phrased, by me, as more of a question. "Sure Cliff" was the reply. Well even as skeptic as I was, I must say it was excellent. You must try it for yourself. I hope there is a place near you where you can go and get one. I do think one can overdo it but having said that I'd recommend it to anyone. I can't understand why I was the first one in the family to do it. I asked Marilyn time and again to go to town and get one. I finally ended up being the one to give her one. She loved it. The man at the store told me that everyone who gets one almost always comes back for more.

My good friend Ralph has a birthday on Saturday the 22ND. I'm going to try and keep this a secret so please don't tell him, but I'm going to give Ralph a butt rub for his Birthday. I'm giddy. I would love to see the look on his face when he gets it. I know, I know, I won't be able to see his face when he gets it but maybe Char could be there to take a picture of his face when he gets his butt rub from me.

So that all of you guys from out of state don't miss out, I could give you a butt rub when you come for Blogstock '08. Sorry but I'll have to charge you for it. Okay, I know, there are a couple of you who will easily qualify for a free one. That of course will be at my discretion. (I'll bet you're thinking right now that I don't know the meaning of that word)

I know some of you probably would prefer to not wait until next July to try a butt rub for yourself so here's a picture of the product and a website.

http://www.buttrub.com/

I know it's good on chicken and pork. I have yet to try it on beef or veggies. I've been told it's great on everything. Just rub it in, rub it in.

Of Little Girls, Ponies, And Birthday Parties. Part II

You measure wealth not by the things you have, but by the things you have for which you would not take money.

*****

In 2004 I wrote the post named "Breathless." It's always been one of my favorites. A short time ago we had the third Birthday Party for that little girl. The same ponies that were at the local party in the last post were in Lincoln that day giving rides and I think you can tell by the picture that there was a recurring theme.

Of Little Girls, Ponies, And Birthday Parties.

There are many 'engaging' people in this world. This is one of the most. She is one of my Grandaughters. She just turned 6 years old. She can enter a room full of strangers and look every one of them in the eye. I think she is judging which new person would be the most interesting to talk with. Then she'll go talk to them. Here, she is in the park on a very hot day. It was about a month ago. It was her Birthday party.

Her Birthday party had a theme. It was "My Little Pony." The funny part is this girl HAS a little pony of her own. Her Mom takes her little pony to different events, somtimes even for hire. This special day the pony was brought to the park so all who attended the party could get a ride. I opted out.

As you know, my Little Ponies have pink manes.

The new six year old learned that you can lead a horse to water...but you can't make them drink blue water.

I was getting ready to go to the final night of golf league last night. I took off long pants to put on a pair of golf shorts. That right there was the first of several mistakes. The outside temp on my pick-up read 52 degrees on my way home. The stifling heat of a few days ago has turned into dry, crystal clear, cool air. It is 41 degrees this morning as I write. I love it.
Now for some of Cliff's Shorts:
*Marilyn payed dearly to sponsor a team in the local Chamber of Commerce golf scramble at the club. Thinking that it would be fun to have family members in the 4 person scramble she was able to get Tom, our Daughter Juli, Marilyn and myself as a team. Juli doesn't play golf. She could be a great golfer if she tried. She doesn't like the game... yet. After several holes were played in this 18 hole event Juli said, "I've figured it out." I asked, "figured out what?" "Why people play golf." I bit, "Okay, why do people play golf?" She said "It's to make the rest of their ordinary, crappy lives seem...well you know...somehow okay." She might be right.
We did okay. We came in 5 under par which slid us into the bottom of the first flight. Meaning no prize money. Marilyn got two flag prizes. One for closest tee shot on a par 3 and one for closest chip shot to the pin on a par 4. I will admit that having Tom there was kind of like bringing in a ringer. Let's just say we did okay off of the tee. A long ball hitter for sure.
*In church two weeks ago the person giving the children's sermon told the kids that his Mom used to tell him to clean up his room almost every day when he was a little boy. He then asked, "Does your Mom ever tell you to clean up your room?" A little boy raised his hand and a microphone was thrust in his face. He said "Yeah, well welcome to my world." The kids got timing.
*About a month ago it rained all night and the horses got out through a gate that was left unlatched. They trampled all over an area I had seeded to grass and was hoping to add it to the area I mow with our lawn mower. It's been so rough and weedy that I've been using a small tractor and a bush hog (mower) to mow it. I don't care for horses. I think you know that. It made me mad. They somehow put a foot print on every square foot of a newly seeded 1/3 of an acre. It had the appeareance of being a well planned act of terrorism. It rained all night Sunday night and into Monday morning. I get a call from the Sheriff's office. "Hi Cliff we have a report of two horses on county road 45 about 3 miles from the highway, it's muddy, raining, dark and the folks who called us are afraid a car might hit them. Do they belong to you?" I said "It's unlikely they haven't finished off the lawn around my house yet." "What?" she asked. "I said I'll count them and call you back." Marilyn was in Colorado checking on her Dad so I had no one to say "it's raining, they're your horses, you go count em." to. So there I was, in shorts, boots, and holding an umbrella and counting horses at 5:30 in the morning. I counted 10. The right number. I called the Sheriff. Did I mention I don't like horses.
*To explain the pics below, I want you to notice the eyes on the cat and horse. Do you think there is a chance that this farm is on an old nuclear waste site? Also if you'll notice, the horse doesn't like me either.

Who Writes The Titles?

It would be difficult to assemble 300 plus TV channels and not have one of them be worth watching. But DirecTv has done just that. The Clemson vs. Florida State football game went out of control early so I pushed 'Guide' to see what was on.
I found the program called: Get The Body You Deserve.
I thought about that for a moment. I thought "Isn't that the problem?" I already have the body I deserve. What I would like is a body I don't deserve.

Johns Old Barn

You will meet John and Terah at Blogstock. (hopefully) John has written a masterful piece about his Grandpa's barn. Don't miss it.
John and Terah have visited here and even sang in our Church choir. Terah is a serious sounding individual with great comedic timing. When she speaks of a serious topic even, you have to listen to the last few word of her sentence. She will make you laugh.
John can speak and write on my level as witness the post above, or he could blow away the techiest folks you know.
He has written several books and this page might explain some about him. It's hard to find computer folks who grew up on the farm and that I can relate to. When John talks of the family and the old farm he's as down home as you can get. When he talks of programs and new equipment he might get 5000 readers on one post. I've read some of those posts. I could just as well be reading Chinese.
His wife Terah also blogs. You'll find her linked on his blog. You'll also find her to be a serious Mom, and Social worker, and she is cutting edge witty. Her only fault is her love for Dr Pepper with Cadbury eggs at Easter time. Well that and her Underwear Rotation.
Their son just turned one. He will probably begin blogging soon. I should be able to understand him up until he is 6 or 7 years old.
You will enjoy getting to know this family before we get to Blogstock.