Tuesday, April 08, 2008

A Gig

~The secret to success is sincerity. Once you learn to fake that, you've got it made.~

From my brief m.c. gig last night.

The police were called to my Grandaughter's daycare. There was a 3 year old resisting a rest.

What do you call a short fortune teller who has escaped from prison? A small medium at large.

Our local hardware store is giving away dead batteries, free of charge.

If you don't pay your exorcist you could be repossessed.

I saw a chicken crossing the road yesterday. It was poultry in motion.

I don't know why they never call me back for a second engagement.


Mike ( ex scientia, veritas ) said...

This horse walks into a bar and the bartenders asks, "Why the long face?"

Baa-rumm-bumm. ;0)

Cliff said...

Love it Mike.

Rachel said...

Cute Cliff!!!

Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?
He took them to a pignic. :)

Flip Flop Momma said...

what bone is the most musical?

A tromBONE..

My boy loves that one..ha

Jerry said...

Hello? Hello?

*thump thump* Is this mike on?

Lucy Stern said...

cliff, my father in law calls those groaners....

bobbie said...

"Poultry in motion" An oldie - but definitely a goodie.

Jamie Dawn said...


Those are great, Cliff!

nora said...

Hey, I never got called back after my second engagement. I guess you're supposed to say yes, when someone pops the question.

When Ralph discovered he had Lyme disease he was really ticked off.

Sue said...

My tongue got in front of my eye teeth and I couldn't see what I was saying.

Sandy said...

Thanks for the laugh....I'm going to have to share these, they're too funny not to share.