Tuesday, January 31, 2006

It's a Miracle!

Marilyn and I have been remodeling our bathroom. The shower surround was the main part. To that we added painting everything, and had the tub professionally refinished. All of that is done and is looking good. Our problem was, the upgrades, all made our sink look like a rusted out '69 T-bird sitting with the new cars in a dealership. So we made the decision to get a new sink.
We made the fifty plus mile trip to Mennards. We had decided to go with porcelain to avoid all of the problem we had with the finish on our old plastic one.
We had measurements of the old sink and base cabinet. Then one of us said something like, "well if we could go a bit bigger, the selection is much better." "Yeah, this one would only be 8 inches longer, on each side, and look, this marble top with the back splash and this Porcelain sink that mounts underneath, neat huh." Okay then, we had a deal. I said I could install it. The fact that I have never done this before didn't bother me. I tried to avoid the vision that kept popping up in my brain. The one where I'm laying on my back, trying to reach into a cavity that isn't big enough for me to reach into. The one where, with a red face, I yell "MARILYN, CALL THE @#!*#* PLUMBER!"
A side note here: Doing things I know little about doesn't usually stop me. People often say to me, "Cliff, how do you do it, if I got up in front of a crowd to speak, I wouldn't know what to say". Well my fellow bloggers, not knowing what to say has never stopped me from saying it.
The same applies with a new and bigger vanity and sink. How hard could this be?
On our trip home is where the magic comes in. While visiting, driving, and minding our own business, the vanity and marble top, began to grow. And when we measured it at home, in the hallway outside the bathroom, it had become so large that it obviously wasn't going to work. I thought it might, but Marilyn doesn't want to have to lean to the right while sitting on the toilet. I opined that in the grand scheme of things, we aren't sitting there all that much. She explained it to me again and it turns out we do.
So we have returned our $500 remodel of the vanity and sink, and we came home with an $89, plastic upgrade of the sink only. Thankfully, all I'll have to do is replace the sink. How hard could that be? MARILYN!!


Rachel said...

Cliff, it's a good thing you are so handy to be able to do all these things!

I had to laugh when you were talking about having to lean way to the right! What a funny picture!

I'm sure the new upgrades are lovely and the new plastic sink will be just fine!

Jerry said...

It probably is a good idea to leave a straight up-and-down clearance for the toilet. An S-curve motion on the way down, could lead to an accident.

I think you just jinxed yourself by uttering the words "How hard could that be?" in reference to plumbing. Good luck.

Jim said...

Hi Cliff

Thanks for the year update. I was living in Lincoln, but was in Omaha that time filling sandbags.

The end of your experience was a surprise to me. I thought you guys probably just moved the toilet over eight inches.

You are pretty brave. Are you sure the old toilet matches the new stuff?

Mike ( ex scientia, veritas ) said...

It's amazing how the easiest project can take on a life of it's own. I remember doing your very project - I had just fitted , secured and glued a rather heavy faux marble top to the cabinet. THEN I noticed that I hadn't installed the faucets and drains first. So I ended up having to do it from below. My prehensile tail comes in handy on those days. ;)

Triplet Dads said...

Hi Cliff - tell Auntie M that she just needs to learn to do the crossword puzzle left handed and she'll be set with the bigger setup.

Just Help Me said...

my boys have pee all over the place with a straight toliet, i can't imagine what my bahtroom would look like if the toilet had a lean to it. lol

Rhodent said...

ROFL! YOu are a funny guy!

Ralph's Homespun Headlines said...

How hard can that be? I quit saying those words a long time ago. Look at the bright side. You saved over $400 by going with the plastic upgrade. If it were me I would saved another $300 by not doing it myself. I have to make a lot trips to the hardware store to replace things I break, buy things I didn't know I needed, etc.

Peter said...

"How hard could that be?" I'm guessing you know the answer to that bt now Cliff.!!!

Miki said...

cliff, you crack me up. I enjoyed your "remodel" story, I get it because we are going to "do it" soon. Kitchen first, then bathroom. It can't be much worse than it already is, our toilet is on a 1 and 1/2 inch slab of marble, raised from the floor(previous owner's genius) we don't understand why, but that is the way it is, and has bee for the whole time we have lived here, in lovely yellow, the color of the porcelin, not the marble!

Jamie Dawn said...

GREAT humorous post!!
Not having anything to say has never kept me from saying it either, even if I do sound like a seal with laryngitis.
I'm glad you chose not to force yourselves to have to lean to the side while on the pot. You would have developed a terrible crick in your lower back.

green-eyed lady said...

Terrific FUNNY post! :)
( I hope I can rib Marilyn that I thought she already leaned to the right, as in "conservative", but there's a limit especially in the "reading room."

So, CLiffers, please hop a plane and come here, b/c we finally got a sink, faucet and cabinet for the one that has been broken a year; The patched pipe stopped working in the spring. The bucket underneath has to be emptied 3 times a day and the sink could drop and break our feet so we stand in a peculiar fashion (moreso than our usual oddness.) ;)

Only thing is, my sweet "Mr. Escape Artist" is not only traveling soooo much for his jobs, but also required by work to go back to college for an advanced degree while still working more than full time, so we keep emptying the bucket and now we look at the sink still in the box. He will kick my you know what if GEL does what I usually do, which is do it myself....but no can do for this project unless I had a helper and our daughter is in school sunup to sundown. (Theatre kid)

At least ours was on sale, too. Glad yours is all in fine! Oh, yes, this time I did remember to measure before we trekked to the store because eyeballing measuring isn't his forte. I've made mistakes, too and we're familiar w/ the lug it back to the store routine. Ugh.

I am lucky he's pretty darn good at fixing things. If I posted otherwise, I'd have to do so under a different penname lol.

poopie said...

I feel your pain ;)

JUST A MOM said...

YOU sir are a brave man!!!!! Can you come visit me?

Lynda said...

Personally, I don't think that your set got bigger. I think the one they had in the store was smaller. Like those little camping display tents that my brother, sister and I called hamster tents. But once we went camping, the tent my parents bought fit the family.

Paul said...

I've been replacing a sink since, well, let's see...Mother's Day weekend two years ago.

It's not that hard.

Cliff Morrow said...

That's funny Paul.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

so should I call you if I want to replace my sink?..

practise makes perfect cliff, come on over;)

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